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Stowe, VT, 05672
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Process

December 10, 2013 Marcie Scudder
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First snow of the season.

Softly...gently...quietly falling. Transforming the landscape from grey/brown to winter white. A reminder - that no thing is final. No feeling. No event. No season. Just when we think we've got it all figured out - it changes. Life does.

It's hard to know where to begin. Here. Now. Today.

Be kind - I tell myself. You've been here...you've done this before. It's nothing new. You've shown up. You're present. You're awake and aware. You've already begun. You just don't know it.

And the snow is still falling. The beautiful sound of silence. No question or doubt - altho the season is long and dark and cold and sometimes hard - winter is my favorite. When everything lies dormant...warming seeds for new growth.

I'm one part wanting only to look back. To re-visit this past year...and re-member. All that was good...and all that wasn't. All that didn't happen...and all that did. All the failures...and - perhaps even - some of the successes.

And I'm another part looking forwards. That part - niggling and nagging at me...telling me that it's time to close that end-of-year-book and open another. Allow what was...to be just as it was. Look at it. See it. Roll it around for a bit and touch it. Feel it in my body. And without any judgement - let it go.

And the snow is still falling. It's only December. I need not go 'there'...when I'm still right 'here' - wherever that may be and just as I am. Today. Now.

Some days - it's harder to know where to begin. Some days - it's easier.

Today - I'm carefully considering my thoughts...I'm mindfully mapping out new directions...I'm setting fresh intentions. And I'm reminding myself - again - that no thing is final. No feeling. No season. No thought. Yesterday is behind me. What will be tomorrow...will be.

Because - today - I don't know. Where or what or how to begin. I'm doing the one thing that I do know. To show up. To breathe. To connect. To listen.

Be kind - I remind myself - you just did it.

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