For Family

At the end of each day - we go home. 

We eat. We laugh. We find comfort in being together. There are conversations that I never imagined we'd have. Ever.

I'm grateful for my family - that we are good and strong and together. I'm grateful for the outpouring of communal support and love. I'm grateful for this time - slowing.

And - I'm sad.

I'm sad for my loss of innocence. For my children's. For this life lesson. I'm sad that my reality will never be quite the same. Again.

My head resists. My heart surrenders. There is so little of import in our lives over which we have any control. And yet - I try -  so hard to control it.

There's something quieting...peaceful about sitting like this. Listening to the sound of steady breath. No one and no thing to distract. All that truly matters - right now - is this.

And - at the end of each long very long and confusing day - we return home.

We eat. We laugh. We find comfort in being together. Just like this.